Cooking Disasters

[casss]

lets have some cooking disasters
my best recent one was making a spinach and feta pie with sweet pastry.
tried to persuade myself it was an unusual cheesecake - bit didn't work

[TMouse]

Baking Choccy cakes for school cake stall.

Put (double) mix in oven (2 tins) and realise have missed an ingredient. Remove both tins, scrape back into bowl, add the (whatever - eggs I think), replace into rewashed tins. Place silicon tin into oven. Grab springform tin, get to halfway into oven and bottom drops out - causing mixture to ooze all thru the oven and warming draw, down onto kitchen floor, creating the biggest mess imaginable. Give up.

Crazychris then comes home and whips up perfect carrot cake instead. This is why I stay out of the kitchen.

[Conners]

I managed to burn a small pot of rice tonight. I mean how the hell can you do that? Well actually it's pretty easy - you go into the garage and tweak the bar position on your roadie until it's just so, then sort out the lever position, and then spend about half an hour getting the bar tape so it's just so again, and then get a whiff of smoldering...

[happybaboon]

Fortunately I have a knack of usually not fucking anything up when I'm cooking for others - most people think I cook pretty damn well, actually.

...But when I'm cooking for myself and I decide to tinker a little bit

Attempting to make a vegetable smoothie was probably my worst one this year. Celery that's gone through a blender tastes quite bad and has the worst texture I've ever experienced

[nostromo]

Fortunately I have a knack of usually not fucking anything up when I'm cooking for others - most people think I cook pretty damn well, actually.

...But when I'm cooking for myself and I decide to tinker a little bit

Attempting to make a vegetable smoothie was probably my worst one this year. Celery that's gone through a blender tastes quite bad and has the worst texture I've ever experienced

[will_b]

Yeah celery through a blender isn't so good, it's not too bad through a juicer when added to carrots etc... but not too much of it.

Made a steak and kidney pie once, was bloody good untill I got to the kidney. No matter how much tomato sauce I put on I just couldn't swallow it.

[Bigfoot]

Chicken I cooked caught fire for a short period... ended up being tasty once the skin was peeled off


Grill at work is much closer to the burners than home one...

[crazychris]

I don't have disasters, just challenges. Plus, the ability to eat ANYTHING I cook.

[happybaboon]

Chicken I cooked caught fire for a short period... ended up being tasty once the skin was peeled off


Grill at work is much closer to the burners than home one...

Charred chicken is the best!

[E Dogg Capizzle]

It's cancerlicious.

[Wobbler]

My uncle was cooking a casserole of some description once that required a cup of chicken stock, he put a cup of the powder in.

[happybaboon]

Awesome

[Simon_K]

Mum was making Chicken soup a few years back. Boiled up a carcass and when it was done, pulled the bones etc out, tipped the remaining liquid down the plughole then realised what she'd done...

[crazychris]

Mum was making Chicken soup a few years back. Boiled up a carcass and when it was done, pulled the bones etc out, tipped the remaining liquid down the plughole then realised what she'd done...

Mothers are great for that sort of thing...
Some greats from my yoof:
1. Mum put a couple of eggs on to boil, went upstairs, had a shower, put her face on, then went out. I arrived home to find the eggs had boiled dry, then exploded all over the kitchen. Awful smell for about 2 weeks later.
2. Mum put a pressure cooker on with silverside in it (yuk!) set it to boil, went upstairs, had a shower, put her face on and went out. This time, she arrived home to the noise of an angry ping pong ball in a tin can. The pressure cooker had blown all it's steam, including any that was in the meat, leaving nothing more than a small fist sized ball of rock, bouncing around in the cooker. That smell lasted over a month.
3. How to cook soup? Easy, put the whole can in a bath of water, put it on the boil. Wait till hot, then open the can. First hole in the seal converted the can of soup into a hot soup cannon, spraying tomato soup over stove, walls and ceiling. Stain lived on the ceiling for years.
4. Not cooking, but after losing her purse, we discovered a pack of frozen peas in the hot water cupboard. Not frozen. They had been placed between towels about a week earlier. A quick check of the freezer produced the missing purse. No, I don;t have any idea how that works either.

Still love the batty old cow tho.

[Simon_K]

Yeah they sure have their moments...

First introduction to sushi and she though the green blob next to a piece was some avocado that had escaped so grabbed that too... Wasabi!

All mockery aside, there were things she made that I always ask for when the opportunity arises. Spaghetti and meatballs in an awesome herby sauce, A deepdish lemon cheesecake which is almost souffle like and good old Rumballs...Home cooking FTW(when done properly and without distraction)